What's pest-ering me

There's this huge hoo-hah about MNC demons Coke and Pepsi busily poisoning us with excessive levels of pesticide in their drinks. Some states have banned sales of their products, other have even banned their manufacture.

The companies themselves have issued the usual half-page advertisements protesting their innocence and adherence to worldwide standards.

What nobody's explained to me is where this alleged pesticide is coming from. Surely no one is suggesting that the Colas add in DDT to make up the volume and cut costs. And I doubt that they are that paranoid about pest control as to over-fumigate their factory premises so that pesticides get into the bottles. And I doubt that pesticide constitutes one of the famous secret ingredients.

That leaves only one place: the water.

Yep, the pesticides have probably leached from the over-dosed soil into the ground water and most of our wells and lakes are probably chock-full of the salubrious stuff.

So if the pesticides are in the water to start with, we are drinking the damn things anyway. How come nobody's bothered to test the tap water?

No convenient scapegoat around, is that it?

Who can I sue?

And why do mosquitoes continue to feed off me?